Hank's Net Worth is $150M+. His Goal? To Find the Perfect Balance Between Luxury and Practicality.

We spoke to Hank in this week's episode of Moneywise.

Hank (not their real name btw) made his fortune in the tech industry, starting with electronics in the early 80s before moving into paging and cell phone distribution. His company merged with his biggest competitor and grew to $3 billion in sales before he exited in 1996 for $60 million.

Like all Moneywise episodes, Hank breaks down his net worth, income, portfolio, and monthly expenses and then I, your humble host, pick it all apart.

We also went deep on: what it's really like living in a 24,000 square foot mansion, the true costs (both financial and time) of maintaining such an enormous property, and whether Hank believes it was ultimately worth it.

Below you'll find my summary of the episode along with the entire transcript.

And by the way...this podcast, the concept of it came from Hampton, a community I founded where CEOs and business owners come together in small groups of 8 to help each other grow. Hampton members range from people with newish startups doing $3M in revenue all the way up to publicly traded companies with hundreds of millions in revenue and thousands of employees. Because of Hampton, I get to see these private conversations about business, money, success, and life. I figured some of these private conversations should be public, which is why I started this podcast. If you're a CEO, founder, or business owner, check this out. New Moneywise episodes come out weekly.

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The Numbers

• Net Worth: Approximately $150-200 million (the mansion represents 5-8% of his net worth)
• Exit: $60 million when he sold his cell phone distribution company in 1996
• Business Revenue: Company grew to $3 billion in sales before his exit
• Property Details:
  • 24,000 square feet total (18,050 under air conditioning)
  • 9 bedrooms (7 in main house, 2 in guest house)
  • Built on 3 acres
  • Purchase price: ~$1 million for the lot
  • Build cost: $8-8.5 million (without furnishing)
  • Total investment: ~$10 million including furnishings
• Monthly Expenses:
  • Landscaping: $1,300/month
  • Electricity: $1,500-2,000/month
  • Gas: $400-500/month
  • Pool cleaning: $400/month
  • Repairs: $50,000-60,000/year
  • Total monthly maintenance: ~$10,000/month
• Time Cost: 5-10 hours per week managing the property (equivalent to a part-time job)

Leveling Up Through Real Estate

Hank's journey to his current mansion wasn't an overnight leap but rather a progression through increasingly larger homes as his wealth grew. He started with a small townhouse, then moved to a 3,600 square foot home that felt like "a castle" at the time. After his big exit, he built an 11,000 square foot custom home, followed by an 8,500 square foot home after separating from his wife.

His current 24,000 square foot mansion wasn't planned to be so large. As Hank explains, "No way did I ever plan to build a house this big. No way. I never even thought about it." Instead, the size grew organically as he and his fiancée listed all the features they wanted: "What do we want in a home? What rooms do we want? What's important? What have I always fantasized about having in my once in a lifetime house?"

The result was a property that includes a tennis court, basketball court, movie theater, manicure/pedicure room, eight garages, and a separate two-bedroom guest house. When they first moved in, Hank admits, "it was still cavernous. I mean, it was just ridiculous. And we looked at each other and said, like, what did we do? I felt like we needed a tram to get from one side."

The True Cost of Luxury Living

While the purchase price and build costs are substantial, the ongoing expenses of maintaining such a large property represent a significant commitment. Hank pays around $10,000 monthly just for basic maintenance, not including unexpected repairs which can add $50,000-60,000 annually.

Beyond the financial costs, there's the time investment. Hank spends 5-10 hours weekly managing contractors, evaluating proposals, and overseeing work—essentially a part-time job. "It's whether it's hiring contractors, evaluating their proposals and trying to oversee what they're doing. I probably spend ten hours a week doing it," he explains.

Even simple tasks become complex in a house of this size. As Hank notes, "These are LED lights, and we're saying you have to get a structure to stand on, just like they do when they're painting and stuff" just to change a lightbulb in high-ceiling rooms.

Unlike many of his neighbors, Hank doesn't employ a full-time house manager, which adds to his personal workload. "I can tell you this. I'm the only guy that I believe washes and waxes my own cars in the neighborhood," he says.

Is a Mansion Worth It? Age and Life Stage Matter

The podcast explores a crucial question: Is living in such a large home actually worth it? The answer seems to depend largely on your age and life stage.

For young families with active careers, a mansion may not be practical. Sam Parr references earlier Moneywise guests like Neil Patel, who downsized from 10,800 to 3,000 square feet and found he saw his kids much more frequently as a result. Another guest, Michael, who earns $15 million annually, deliberately chose a modest 3,400 square foot home because "if you gave me like a 7000 square foot house, I don't think it would increase my joy."

According to Nashville architect Ryan Davis, most clients building massive homes are doing so with grandchildren in mind: "They're grandparents and they want to make a cool place for their grandkids to come hang out with them."

For Hank, who built the home thinking his children would use it frequently, reality turned out differently. "The only thing that didn't happen is my children a little bit older, and I thought the guest house they would be using more, but they go off on their own."

As Hank ages, even he is reconsidering the practicality of such a large space: "I don't think [this will be my last house], because I won't last forever if I keep it with all the work that has to be done."

Finding Purpose in Property Management

Interestingly, for Hank, managing the property has become a purpose in his retirement. "After I did retire at an early age, I just did not know what to do with myself. I was like walking around in circles."

The house provides structure and problems to solve—something that appeals to his business-oriented mind. However, he acknowledges this is changing as he gets older: "I'm getting to the point now where I would like not to have to worry about it as much."

When asked if the massive house has been worth it, Hank is ultimately positive: "I would absolutely say in retrospect, for the years we've been here, we got a lot of use out of this house because we built it for the things that we would use our lifestyle... it really became a centerpiece to entertaining and family."

However, he admits he likely wouldn't have built something so large just for himself: "Would I have done it probably on my own? Probably not."

Other Key Quotes

"No way did I ever plan to build a house this big. No way. I never even thought about it. I said, look, I don't want to talk about size. I don't want to say, I'm going to build this and we'll fit into it. What I said is, what do we want in a home? What rooms do we want? What's important? What have I always fantasized about having in my once in a lifetime house?"

"When we moved in, it was still cavernous. I mean, it was just ridiculous. And we looked at each other, said, like, what did we do? I felt like I was, you know, like we needed a tram to get from one side. But you grow into it."

"It's very similar to running a business. You know, you can be the head of a company, but it's good that you know what everybody's job description is so you understand what they're doing or not doing. Otherwise you have no idea. And there's no check and balance."

"It's a part-time job, and I think it makes a difference. I'm just not trying to micromanage as much as I'm trying to learn what I can do and what somebody else can do."

"After I did retire at an early age, I just did not know what to do with myself. I was like walking around in circles. It would be great to be able to be a different person privately than you are in business. It's really hard to separate the two."

"I would absolutely say in retrospect, for the years we've been here, we got a lot of use out of this house because we built it for the things that we would use our lifestyle. So in my case, yes, I'm happy because, you know, I didn't have to go out to join all these private clubs and stuff like that."

Full Transcript

[00:00:01] Sam Parr: When we moved in, it was still cavernous. I mean, it was just ridiculous. And we looked at each other and said, like, what did we do in 2022?

[00:00:08] Sam Parr: The average home size in America was just over 2200ft². Now, most McMansions are in the ballpark of around 3000 to 5000ft². Now imagine living in a house four times as big.

[00:00:20] Hank: It's approximately 24,000 total. 1805 under air.

[00:00:24] Sam Parr: That's the size of the house of today's guest. We're going to call him Hank. Now, personally, when I think living in a house that big, I can only think of one thing. Maintenance. It's too much. It's too much.

[00:00:36] Sam Parr: And even with a ton of staff helping you out and running things with a house that size, you're basically running a commercial property. But on the other hand.

[00:00:44] Hank: I have a tennis court with a basketball court, movie theater, manicure, pedicure room, eight garages, and a guest house with two bedrooms.

[00:00:50] Sam Parr: And that's not all. But is it worth it? And if it is for who? Spoiler alert as it turns out, according to Hank, your stage of life matters. Hank's gonna tell us how he wound up living in a 20 zero zero zero square foot home. How much it costs in terms of both time and money. And if he actually likes it.

[00:01:14] Sam Parr: Hey, everyone, I'm Sam Parr, and this is Moneywise. There's a ton of podcasts out there that teach you how to make money, but none that really teach you how to handle the life changes that wealth brings. The reason I know this is I'm co-founder of a company called Hampton, where a community of business owners, CEOs, startup founders, and because of Hampton, I'm able to see behind the scenes information and conversations that people who have a bunch of money have. And that community is what inspired this podcast with money wise. I want to be able to have conversations with high income, high net worth people and figure out how they spend their money, how they don't spend their money, how they save, how they invest, what makes them happy, the types of conversations that are rarely ever had publicly. And with these conversations on money wise, we're going to be radically transparent about the numbers while we do it. All right, so in today's episode, I talked to a guy named Hank. Hank owns a home that is roughly 24,000ft². That is huge. That is a mansion anywhere you live in the world. It's a massive house. And the reason why I wanted to talk to him is because I live in a relatively small home, about 2000ft². When I had a little bit of success in my career and started having a family, I began thinking, what would it be like to have a huge home? And so I thought, I'm gonna go find someone who has the biggest house I could think of, and that's Hank.

[00:02:28] Sam Parr: And I wanted to ask him, how much did this home cost to buy? How did he finance it? How did he make his money? Is living in a home like this worth it? Is it awesome? What stinks about it? I wanted to ask him all of the questions about living in a massive, massive house so I can maybe figure out, is this right for me? Do I actually want to do this? And I think a lot of you will have similar questions. Is living in such a huge home worth it? Now, before we start, I want to ask you a question. Do you think you'd enjoy living in a 24,000 square foot house? I want you to think about your answer now. Just keep it in your head. And at the end of the episode, after we learn everything that we've learned, I'm going to ask you this question again, and I'm curious if your answer will change. Now let's start what we always do, finding out what the hell Hank has done with his life to be able to afford a 24,000 square foot house. Hank made his money in tech, but likely not the tech that comes into mind when I say that.

[00:03:18] Hank: I actually started in the 80s, 81, 82, kind of in the electronics business little parts, batteries, video bags, all kinds of electronics. And then that migrated into VCRs and other battery packs and products like that. I was making a living. Barely. And then, um, I got involved in paging.

[00:03:41] Sam Parr: Like, a pager.

[00:03:42] Hank: Yeah. Which was my answer to the first cell phone, I guess.

[00:03:48] Sam Parr: Yes. So, for context, Hank is in his 70s, so he's been at this for a while. That business continued to evolve, and it ended up being a very large operation, mostly distributing cell phones.

[00:03:58] Hank: When I announced that I was looking to go public, all my competitors came out of the woodwork and said, well, wait, wait, don't do that. Let us team up with you. So I started getting offices. This is great. Turned down a few of them, which in retrospect, people thought I was crazy. But I ended up merging with my biggest competitor. And the two of those companies together was kind of like one plus one equals three, because we became very large. I brought my lines that I had been trusted, entrusted to carry his lines. And we probably became the largest of the second largest distributor.

[00:04:33] Sam Parr: And how big was the business in terms of sales and profit?

[00:04:37] Hank: Well, so our first year together, I'm going to say we did maybe a half $1 billion, 500 million, $600 million. By the time I exited a year and a half later or two years later, I stepped down. I think we were around 3 billion in sales.

[00:04:52] Sam Parr: So huge.

[00:04:53] Hank: Yeah. Bigger than I ever imagined, that's for sure.

[00:04:57] Sam Parr: Then in 1996, Hank exited the company and he made around $60 million. But Hank didn't just get tens of millions of dollars and immediately buy a massive house like a video game. He started working his way through the levels. First his starter home.

[00:05:15] Hank: My first house was a little townhouse.

[00:05:18] Sam Parr: Then the regular old McMansion.

[00:05:20] Hank: My second house when I was married, you know that I was shaking when I signed the agreement. It was like a 3600 square foot, which to me was like, oh my God. We ran from room to room. It was like, wow, this is a castle.

[00:05:34] Sam Parr: Then there was his first custom build.

[00:05:36] Hank: My first house that I built was 11,000ft², which also was ridiculously huge to me and beautiful, but in a small lot.

[00:05:45] Sam Parr: And after that, I guess you could say he downsized. I mean, technically he did.

[00:05:48] Hank: I ended up moving on to a different home in a country club myself. Unfortunately, we separated from my wife at the time. That house is like 8500 square foot.

[00:06:01] Sam Parr: And then he leveled back up. It was after that house that Hank, with his now fiance, decided to build his current house.

[00:06:10] Hank: No way did I ever plan to build a house this big. No way. I never even thought about it. I said, look, I don't want to talk about size. I don't want to say, I'm going to build this and we'll fit into it. What I said is, what do we want in a home? What rooms do we want? What's important? What have I always fantasized about having in my once in a lifetime house? And it kind of grew. Oh, you want a manicure pedicure room? You want to. You want a movie theater? You want this? You want that? I said, sure, sign me up. Yeah, it sounds good.

[00:06:40] Sam Parr: So the process didn't start out with Hank saying, you know what? I want to own a house the size of a bowling alley. It really just kind of happened because he said yes to everything he and his fiancée wanted, right? I mean, when you have the money to put literally anything you want inside a home, why not just go for it, right?

[00:06:56] Hank: Well, all of a sudden, the house just started growing. And I said, well, what? Can we shave anything off? Can we? And we did like most people did. We looked around, tried to find the oh, this house didn't have this, and this house didn't have that, and this house didn't have enough ground. So ultimately, if you have the time and the ability and the patience because it takes a couple years to build a house this size, you really end up getting what you want or most of what you want. You still move in and say, oh, I wish I would have put this in. I mean, there's houses in here that have bowling alleys and this and that. I didn't need that. But it's cool. It sounds cool. So we put in what we thought was right, and when we moved in, it was still cavernous. I mean, it was just ridiculous. And we looked at each other, said, like, what did we do? I felt like I was, you know, like we needed a tram to get from one side. But you grow into it.

[00:07:50] Sam Parr: We're going to get to the pros and cons shortly. But let's talk about the thing that you guys love about money wise. Let's talk about the money. How much did Hank actually pay? First, the price for the lot itself.

[00:08:02] Hank: To me, it was just shy of $1 million for a three acre lot, which in Florida in this area is considered a buy. When the initial plans came out with this development did not sell at all. It was out in the middle of nowhere. Nothing was built around it. None of the homes were built. It was just like out in the middle of nowhere. And you make a long story short, I was able to buy the ground relatively inexpensively compared to what it would cost today. The lots alone are half of what my house costs now.

[00:08:30] Sam Parr: And then there was the build cost.

[00:08:32] Hank: The cost to build the house without furnishing was about $8 million, $8.5 million with the ground, with furnishing, maybe 10 million.

[00:08:44] Sam Parr: That's how much Hank paid around ten years ago. Obviously, time and location mean a lot when it comes to housing costs, and real estate prices have gone up, so you have to take inflation into account. Now if we simplify this a little bit and we look at Zillow, that price $10 million, that's going to get you around 4 to 5000 square foot in the form of a townhome in Manhattan.

[00:09:08] Sam Parr: And then in other states, you're going to be able to buy the most expensive home. I'm from Missouri. I don't think there is a home for sale for $10 million. And if it is, it's something like 250 acres or some huge ranch or something epic like that. On the other hand, it'll get you about 12,000ft² and two and a half acres in Oklahoma and the nicest property around. So for this episode, we spoke to Nashville based architect Ryan Davis.

[00:09:29] Ryan: I work on primarily private residences. Mostly what I focus on are kind of high performance and high design houses.

[00:09:37] Sam Parr: We asked him what the cost to build a custom home in his area would be if he were to do it right now.

[00:09:41] Ryan: Today I was just having this conversation with a builder last week. I mean, we were 6 or $700 a square foot.

[00:09:48] Sam Parr: So doing some math, let's say you were building a 15,000 square foot house that would come to around $10.5 million. Now, building and buying are two separate beasts. You could just buy a move in, ready home and skip the hassle of a years long project. But if you're making a purchase this big and something that you're going to live in for decades, you're going to want this to be exactly the way you want it, just like Hank. And of course, Ryan's a bit biased given his business. He makes a fair point about why you should be patient and go through a builder.

[00:10:14] Ryan: They're coming in with specific wants and needs. If you bought something, I feel like they would just be constantly altering it or trying to mold it into the shape of what they really are looking for.

[00:10:24] Sam Parr: Of course, it doesn't end with the buying and building costs. With any home, you're going to have a lot of ongoing expenses, maintenance fees, things like that. And in a moment, we're going to get to a rapid fire of what those are for Hank. But before we do that, we've got to talk mortgage more specifically, why Hank did not get one.

[00:10:41] Hank: When we say I paid cash for it, it sounds like, oh, you know, whatever it was, I did not have it in my back wallet. Of course. There. It's just a question of the value of money. You know what you can make on your money versus what you have to pay for a mortgage? At the time, it was a simple equation. It wasn't that I didn't care about having a mortgage. I had a mortgage in my very first house back in Philadelphia. The 3600 square foot mansion that I thought it was at the time, because mortgage rates were low. But as the mortgage rates went higher, it's just a question of what your money can do if you don't put it into the house. So at the time, I think I just remember making the choice that I was better tying it up in real estate than perhaps keeping it invested so that it wasn't that I just said I didn't care. I actually evaluated the value of the money.

[00:11:31] Sam Parr: What do you think is like a good ballpark? For what percentage of your net worth should be in your primary residence? Like when you were doing the math or you're like, I'm okay with 20%.

[00:11:42] Hank: I mean, I guess in my case, it's, you know, it was, you know, maybe 5% or 8% of my net worth. I can retroactively plug that number in. I didn't think about it at the time. And don't forget, there's two people with two different piles of money paying for it. So a couple together, it's their joint money that's spending it. So it's a different calculation for me. I would not. Let's put it this way. I would not be living in a house this size for me and my grown children. No way would I buy a house this size.

[00:12:18] Sam Parr: All right, as promised, let's talk about some of his ongoing expenses for owning this huge, huge house.

[00:12:24] Hank: I have all kinds of creative ways to make myself feel good about the money I'm wasting or spending, I should say.

[00:12:30] Sam Parr: We'll start with landscaping. And for context, Hank has around three acres.

[00:12:34] Hank: I think I pay $1,300 a month, almost 19, $52,000 a month.

[00:12:39] Sam Parr: And then utilities, which would be heating and cooling. So electricity and water and trash. Do you know what that would be?

[00:12:46] Hank: Trash is included in our taxes here. So electricity is probably around anywhere from 1500 to 2000 a month.

[00:12:54] Sam Parr: That's not bad.

[00:12:55] Hank: Depending on which light bulb is left on. And then there's a gas bill that goes with that. Some of that.

[00:13:01] Sam Parr: What would gas be?

[00:13:02] Hank: Gas. About 400, 500 a month.

[00:13:04] Sam Parr: And then there's repairs which can add up a lot.

[00:13:08] Hank: Yeah, maybe 50, 60,000 a year. I mean, the pool, because everything is 5 or $6000, you know, Petra pool. It's $5,000. Find a leak. It's $1,000. So it does add up.

[00:13:18] Sam Parr: And then you probably have a pool cleaning service. What do they charge per month?

[00:13:22] Hank: They're about 400 and some dollars a month. And they come once a week.

[00:13:26] Sam Parr: These costs actually aren't that crazy, I think.

[00:13:28] Hank: They're not.

[00:13:29] Sam Parr: That's not that crazy for how big it is. But I'm shocked that what I would think what would happen is a vendor would come to your neighborhood and be like, whatever our normal rate is, just multiply that by two.

[00:13:39] Hank: Right. It's just like when you walk in to buy a car, you don't say, give me a car, whatever. Of course I trust you. You do a little research. So by me learning more about it. It's very similar to running a business. You know, you can be the head of a company, but it's good that you know what everybody's job description is so you understand what they're doing or not doing. Otherwise you have no idea. And there's no check and balance. So I'm the check and balance just as much, if not more, than the person that actually does the fixing.

[00:14:10] Sam Parr: All that adds up to around $10,000 a month. But what does this kind of money actually get you? If you're going to have a 24,000 square foot house, you better fill it up with a bunch of cool stuff.

[00:14:21] Hank: It's approximately 24,000 total. 1805 under air, because there's living space and then there's additional. And when your house is built on a decent sized property, which this is, it's about three acres. You have the ability to build all kinds of lodges and different things like that. So they count that in total space. The 1805 would be air conditioned. Let's say it'd be air conditioned space. Let's talk about it that way. It makes it simpler to understand. But the total includes garages and outside space and all that.

[00:14:49] Sam Parr: So it's nine bedrooms.

[00:14:52] Hank: Well, yeah, it's seven in the main house and then a guest house with two bedrooms, separate guest house.

[00:14:58] Sam Parr: And then how many living rooms? How many kitchens, and then what other rooms are there, I think. Did you say you had a mani pedi room?

[00:15:03] Hank: Well, I don't, and if I did, I wouldn't tell you.

[00:15:06] Sam Parr: But the home does though.

[00:15:07] Hank: The home does though, and I passed through it a couple of times.

[00:15:10] Sam Parr: So what are the other rooms.

[00:15:11] Hank: So yeah. So and that's a small room. It's not like a huge commercial place or anything. It's, you know, sink, manicure, pedicure. I don't even know how that stuff works half the time. But it was used and my mom lived with us for a while, so it was easier for her. She couldn't get out to go to the thing. So I always have to rationalize everything that I put in here for you because I sometimes embarrassed about it. But. And then, you know, we have a movie theater, which is kind of 101, you know, in a big house. There's I guess there's certain things that we have an elevator now putting an elevator in A11 story house would not be a good idea. But, you know, we have a couple stories and we've used it. You know, the kids that get hurt, their legs, they do this, they have luggage and they bang up the walls. So there are certain things that just go with a larger house, which add expenses and would be very hard to resell a house this size without an elevator. Not that people may never use it, they may use it. Whatever. Has a movie theater elevator, a fairly a very big family room for entertaining that we designed specifically for that reason because we had parties or whatever, which we used to use quite a bit years ago.

[00:16:18] Sam Parr: Do you have an office?

[00:16:20] Hank: An office that I'm in now? My my own office.

[00:16:22] Sam Parr: And then there's probably another office for your partner. I think you said.

[00:16:25] Hank: She has on the side of her bedroom. Yes. It's a snore room slash office. These are all things we designed prior, because even in the best of situations, people, you know, get out of here. I can't stand this. And you're sick. You're coughing. Whatever. Go into your little cubbyhole there or whatever. It's where you get sent when you're bad.

[00:16:43] Sam Parr: And then a pool and no basketball court or tennis court.

[00:16:47] Hank: I do, I have a tennis court with a basketball court. Yes. They call it a sports court and getting a lot of pressure, which I could care less to do a pickleball court and retrofit it, which I haven't succumbed to yet.

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[00:17:07] Sam Parr: And then how many car garage?

[00:17:09] Hank: Eight garages. And some additional parking for help. You know, that would come to help us out.

[00:17:14] Sam Parr: It's funny, for some reason, I think Hank felt a little embarrassed listing off all the rooms. And so those are actually just the things that he was willing to admit. But when you've got a lot of money to spend, like he does, pretty much anything you want in a living space can be a reality. As an architect, Ryan gets to make loads of those dreams come true.

[00:17:31] Ryan: Usually, I'm attracting unique people with unique skill sets. One that we've done has a client that's kind of a celebrity chef, so we're just designing a crazy kitchen pantry that's so huge and different storage options and stuff. Freezers, stuff like that. It really depends on the client. Yeah. I mean, we had one that was going to be a pretty large house. Unfortunately, the design I did didn't get built, but I mean, he was putting a giant pool with a lazy river and almost like a resort. Had a meeting last week with a guy that we're kind of close to town but still far out, and he wants a helicopter pad.

[00:18:08] Sam Parr: Now, this one's the best. Perhaps the coolest request is also the most common one.

[00:18:12] Ryan: Secret tunnel. Secret tunnel.

[00:18:17] Ryan: People love hidden doors. People love passageways. People love stuff like that. And kids do too. You know, everybody always, always wanting a secret passage or a secret room.

[00:18:26] Sam Parr: And we can all drool at the cost and features of these mansions. But the real question, the question that this whole podcast is about, the question I am trying to answer for myself, is it actually worth it? Aside from getting all these cool, fancy features, what is really the purpose of having such a big space? For most of Ryan's clients.

[00:18:43] Ryan: It's grandkids. It's grandkids. They're at the age where they have kids that have kids. So they're grandparents and they want to make a cool place for their grandkids to come hang out with them. En suite bathrooms, own rooms, maybe their own private areas, like as far as, like a little lounge area or living room with a bar, if they want to make them as comfortable as possible so that they come visit is kind of what what I'm reading into it.

[00:19:05] Sam Parr: And this is exactly what Hank did, though it didn't exactly work out the way he thought it would.

[00:19:10] Hank: The only thing that didn't happen is my children a little bit older, and I thought the guest house they would be using more, but they go off on their own. They all have their own apartments or houses or whatever. So we use it. We use it for, you know, people visiting people we don't know that become our relatives, whatever that. When I come to Florida in the winter.

[00:19:28] Sam Parr: But say you're not a grandparent and your kids are still young as a 24,000 square foot house with all of its crazy features, is that really good for raising children's? My opinion, no, it is not. And I'm gonna explain why. I've talked to a lot of wealthy people through this podcast and the rest of my career. The most obvious thing, and this, frankly, scares me, is when you raise your kids in a fancy environment, I'm incredibly scared of them becoming spoiled and getting used to all this expensive nice stuff and making them soft, rotten and just bad people. And I know a ton of kids that were raised in a wealthy family and they turned out just fine. So this is not a rule. I'm just saying it definitely does scare me about raising kids in such a big fancy house and how it might impact them and how they're going to be adults in their 20s and 30s and be able to relate to average people and not be spoiled and be emotionally stable and healthy. And in fact, on Moneywise, we're gonna do a whole episode on parenting and how to raise kids when you're wealthy. But then there's this other reason. And this is actually something I didn't realize until one of my friends, Neil Patel, who came on episode two on Money Wise, he talked about actually like the logistics of having a huge home and how you actually don't see your kids a lot if you have such a big house.

[00:20:37] Neil Patel: And then we rented a house here that was 10,800ft². Now we're down to 3000ft². I see my kids a lot. Like, no joke. They're around everywhere. They're in our space. There is no office or anything like that, but we interact with them on a daily basis for many more hours than we did in a 10,800 square foot house. My wife and I love it. We're closer as a family.

[00:21:03] Sam Parr: Back in our first episode, which you guys should absolutely listen to. There's a guy named Michael. Michael owns a law firm, and his personal income each year is something like $15 million. He had very similar thoughts to Neil about how big his house should be.

[00:21:16] Michael: I bought my house for a little over a million bucks. 1.1 million. So 3400ft².

[00:21:21] Sam Parr: Not big. Not not big or small. Medium.

[00:21:24] Michael: It's perfect. I have two kids. There's enough space for them to run around. I don't have, like, crazy heating and cooling issues. Like, it's easy to clean. Like with my OCD. I like things clean and organized, so it's like the perfect happy medium. But like, if you gave me like a 7000 square foot house, I don't think it would increase my joy.

[00:21:47] Sam Parr: So the answer to who would enjoy this kind of house is leaning towards older retirement age people, people with grandkids, and people with a lot of time on their hands because these things take a ton of work. Which leads us to a huge potential downside if you're not someone with time on their hands. We talked about the monetary expenses a lot, but there's a massive thing to consider here. Something that is not money. In fact, it's more expensive than money. And that's time. How much time running a house like this can actually cost you? Hank keeps comparing it to running a business, which is pretty funny. I mean, parts of his property even fall into commercial upkeep.

[00:22:21] Hank: The piping is commercial. We have a commercial water meter. We have a commercial. This house has gas as well as electric.

[00:22:29] Sam Parr: How much time per week are you spending? Or per month? Making sure everything's taken care of?

[00:22:34] Hank: I mean, it depends. It's whether it's hiring contractors, evaluating their proposals and and trying to oversee what they're doing. I probably spend ten hours a week doing it, maybe 5 to 10 hours a week.

[00:22:47] Sam Parr: So like a part-time job.

[00:22:48] Hank: It is it's a part-time job, and I think it makes a difference. I'm just I'm not trying to micromanage as much as I'm trying to learn what I can do and what somebody else can do. So I guess the fact is I don't mind doing it. I don't need to hire somebody to screw in a light bulb.

[00:23:04] Sam Parr: And you're semi-retired.

[00:23:06] Hank: Yeah, right. I mean, I do need somebody to change a light bulb. However, that is 25 or 30ft high in a high ceiling. And that's the dilemma we're facing now. These are LED lights, and we're saying you have to get a structure to stand on, just like they do when they're painting and stuff.

[00:23:22] Sam Parr: So scaffolding.

[00:23:23] Hank: Yes. Just changing a light bulb in a high-ceilinged house becomes an issue.

[00:23:27] Sam Parr: But look, even though it is a ton of work for Hank, that's actually one of the reasons why he likes it.

[00:23:33] Hank: That's where a lot of my business, and I think we joked about it a little bit after I did, retire at an early age. I just did not know what to do with myself. I was like walking around in circles. It would be great to be able to be a different person privately than you are in business. It's really hard to separate the two.

[00:23:53] Sam Parr: As he gets a little bit older, that's not so much the case.

[00:23:56] Hank: Well, I think in the beginning we used to when her kids were younger and we had a lot of parties and we had a famous Halloween party every year that, you know, and I had a lot of fun with it. And then it became very like every time I tried to get out the door, it's like, can you just fix this? So I have a to do list of things that whether I call somebody or not, it's a it's a list. I'm getting to the point now where I would like not to have to worry about it as much. I mean, obviously I don't cut my lawn, I don't do the gardening, but I still have to make sure that they're doing it. And if the tree dies and this it's there's something always happening that causes me because I've taken on this responsibility for some crazy reason to do it.

[00:24:37] Sam Parr: Then again, he doesn't necessarily have to take that all on.

[00:24:40] Hank: And a lot of people in this neighborhood have a house manager. I can tell you this. I'm the only guy that I believe washes and waxes my own cars in the neighborhood, to the point where people have driven by and say, hey, what days are you in the neighborhood? And I said, pretty much every day.

[00:24:54] Sam Parr: If Hank was younger, he said he'd likely have someone else do those things.

[00:24:58] Hank: It's a calculation, and I'm sorry to keep going back to this, but it's me saying, what is my time worth versus working and making money versus the people I'm hiring? Different equation than now that I'm not working it now. It's my justification for my not working. If I'm not working, I better do something to save money.

[00:25:16] Sam Parr: But maybe you're not retired. Maybe you are planning on hiring someone to do all that work, though. There will always be work to do and maybe don't have kids or grandkids to fill that space. There's one simple thing that it can come down to.

[00:25:28] Hank: You know you have a subset of people that just want privacy. We have musicians, we have football players. We, you know, because they're in the limelight. So much so this neighborhood is specifically and everybody has their own amenities. Most people have a tennis court. They have a pool. This is more for people that say, look, this is where I want my life at this time in my life to center around. It's just this is where somebody wants privacy.

[00:25:54] Sam Parr: And I get that. I think being wealthy is awesome, but being famous, that is not awesome. I do not think that would be fun. So if you have the money to put everything you need or want in a private place, it makes a lot of sense. Now we've talked about age, and for the most part the consensus has been if you're a young working parent, the house may be too big. 24,000ft. That's a lot for someone with a full time job. Hank aged into having a house that size, but now he's aging out of it. Is this going to be your last house? Is this going to be your place that you're going to live forever?

[00:26:24] Hank: No, I don't think so, because I won't last forever if I keep it with all the work that has to be done. So I'd like to last longer because I like the car stuff and the garages and stuff. So again, that's a quandary because when you start to think about moving, certainly not ready to go into a retirement home yet, I've got to think there's going to be another place prior to that, I hope.

[00:26:47] Sam Parr: Has it been worth it? Are you happy that you went this big?

[00:26:50] Hank: I would absolutely say in retrospect, for the years we've been here, we got a lot of use out of this house because we built it for the things that we would use our lifestyle. So in my case, yes, I'm happy because, you know, I didn't have to go out to join all these private clubs and stuff like that and do all these things. So, you know, we spent more, but it really became a centerpiece to entertaining and family and things like that. So yeah, I'm happy. Would I have done it? Probably on my own? Probably not. You know, as an individual, even with my kids, I that was the house I lived in that was 8500. And they were fine with that. I was fine with that. In fact, they still tell me they miss it to this day.

[00:27:30] Sam Parr: Now, this is actually a cool part. I was also curious to get Ryan's perspective as a builder. Other. Would he himself live in a 20 400 zero square foot house?

[00:27:38] Ryan: I don't think I would. I'm a pretty conservative, frugal person to begin with, so I feel like I could spend that money somewhere else, and having that much space wouldn't necessarily equate to happiness for me. But honestly, if I had a big family with a lot of grandkids that you interview me in ten years, 15 years, that answer might be different.

[00:28:03] Sam Parr: So look, I'm young, I'm in my early 30s. I've got a young family. It's just one kid so far, and hopefully a few more soon. However, 24,000ft² house. That is not for me, but I could see myself making a 5 or 6000 square foot home work. Anything above that, I just think it's way too much work. And by the way, it's insane to be paying 5 or 6000. As if that's small, but it is compared to Hank. It's a really big home. I think it's manageable, but I think anything larger than that. Look, I spend like two, three hours a week right now. Just messing with stuff in my small home. Now. I do not want more work later in life when I'm older, if I've got grandkids, I could see this being awesome. Maybe. If you are considering buying a big house or trying to figure out what size house you want, here's a few tips that I have for you. In my opinion, if you're going to invest this much time and money into a home, something that you're going to be in for many decades and you could afford it, I think you should make sure every detail is thought through and you are getting exactly what you want. Before this podcast, I thought I just wanted to buy a home that was already built, but Hank actually kind of convinced me that building might be a good idea. Brian did tell us, though, that leaving space for compromise is part of the process.

[00:29:23] Brian: Once they see it on paper, once they see the model or what it kind of looks like, they'll sometimes back off of it a little bit and be like, all right, this is we might not need this much space. You know, like when we did a few years ago. It ended up being 15 or 16,000ft². Once we kind of went through that whole process, he's like, yeah, I don't know that we really need this, that and these spaces. We kind of backed it down to maybe 12 or 13.

[00:29:47] Sam Parr: However, there's a balance here. Hank says that he's glad that he found someone on the other side, pushing him to really go for it.

[00:29:54] Hank: If we go back to my comments about running a business at very low margins, I had, I didn't have room for a lot of error. Unfortunately, I can you know, I might have taken a little bit of the fun out by looking at everything. Do we really need this? Do we really need that? Do we really have to have marble floors? And by the way, in retrospect, the house came out beautiful, so I don't regret any of it now. But I think just my mental, you know, thing was, you know, what do I need versus what do I want? What's going to matter? And I do think the reason, unfortunately or fortunately, whichever way you look at it, I did think of the resale value. And it's no different than any other product you buy. You know, if you buy a car and you get every built, you're never going to get credit for it when you trade it in. A house is a little different, and especially a house in this neighborhood where the people that are buying now, the money isn't any object to them, it seems, and they do want all the bells and whistles. So again, I'm not sorry that I did it, but if you ask me, did I agonize over some things I did? And my partner who built the house was also very cautious. He wasn't like, oh, just to the best of this, the best of that. He would say, look, don't waste your money on this. So yeah, that went into it on my end. And then I had a check and balance on the other end saying, don't be cheap. You know, you want to enjoy your house. Stop thinking about it like that way. And she ended up winning, I think. But in retrospect, I'm super happy that I did it.

[00:31:16] Sam Parr: And that takes me to the next piece of advice, which is you should be really intentional about your money. I call this conscious money. I stole it from my friend Ramit, and that basically means to be really thoughtful about what makes you happy and to spend more money on that, and to not just mindlessly spend.

[00:31:32] Ramit: It's really cool to see somebody that's kind of concerned where their money's going, and not just throwing money at things and being like, okay, you know, let's is there a better way or a cheaper way to do this?

[00:31:41] Sam Parr: This episode has actually inspired me to be very specific about the type of house that I want, and to map it out and to literally just write it down, talk to my wife, say we want a room that looks like this, that does this, we want this many rooms. We want our kitchen to feel like this. And to map out how much that might cost. And if we actually want it and truly close our eyes and imagine that we're there, waking up in the morning, going to bed at night, what do we do throughout the day? And to be actually super thoughtful about the space. The reason being is if I'm going to spend this much money and this much effort on a space, I actually want it to be perfect. I want it to be just like I want it to be. And I think surrounding myself in a space that I live in and that I'm at every day, I actually think it impacts my mood. It impacts how I work. I think it impacts if I'm happy. I actually think that my physical surroundings does have a massive impact on my happiness and my mood. And lastly, 24,000ft² is huge. Even 10,000 is massive. So unless your passion is interior design, save yourself some stress and time and just go ahead and hire a designer.

[00:32:45] Hank: I had to kind of leave my Philly boy attitude behind and realized that if I'm going to build a house like this, I can't be putting stuff in from. I don't want to mention names, but I can't be putting furniture together. We had to get, you know, we had a decorator who was extremely helpful and we needed definitely needed a decorator because a lot of people who believe they're artistic and even I thought myself, okay, I'm artistic, whatever, but you really need to help because the mistakes end up costing more than you would have spent originally. And in a house this big, to be able to envision how it's going to lay out is very difficult because everything's so big, you know.

[00:33:24] Sam Parr: And so I asked you at the very beginning of this episode, do you want to live in a 20 400 zero square foot house. I had to think of what the answer was before. Now, knowing what you know. I want to know, has your answer changed? I'm curious if we swayed you one way or the other. So if you're listening to this on Spotify or iTunes, leave a review and put it in the comments. If your opinion did change, or if you're on Twitter, let me know. The Sam Parr is my handle. And tell me, what size home do you want? Did this change your opinion on anything? And I want to actually hear what your dream home and actually share photos with me. Because, you know, I like to be inspired.

[00:34:10] Sam Parr: And so, my friend, that's it. That's this episode of Money Wise. And by the way, if you liked this conversation, you guys should check out Hampton. That's my company. It's Join Hampton. Hampton is a community with founders, CEOs, people who own companies. The average size company is around 20 to 30 million in revenue. But we've got companies from two all the way up to hundreds of millions of dollars in sales. And we have conversations like this all day. We have conversations about money. We have conversations about business. We have conversations about things that you can't Google. They only happen behind closed doors. I personally review and vet everyone who applies, giving them the thumbs up or thumbs down. Because we want this community to be perfect. We can have these safe conversations that are somewhat embarrassing to have, but they're really important for people who are in this category. So check it out. And finally, I've said on this podcast so many times that this podcast takes a ton of work. I'm not the one doing all of the work. You see, I've hired this company called Lower Street. You can check them out Lower Street. They've helped me produce this podcast. My partner in crime here is Jackie. She helped me find guests. She helped me write the podcast. All the editing you hear. It's been incredibly easy for me, so check them out if you want a podcast. Lower street.